High Achiever Mom, Juggling Too Many Things, HITS THE WALL!
A physician with a large clinical practice, a research appointment, a faculty position at a prestigious medical school, a spouse, a house, and three children under five was appalled to find herself, day after day, arriving at her research office, sitting down at the desk, and . . . doodling! She was frightened. She told me, "I always wanted to be a doctor. There’s really nothing else I want to be doing. Can you help me get motivated again?"
We found a diagnosis that surprised her (but not me). The part of her that craved and needed time to herself (she had NO TIME TO HERSELF, ever) assumed control as the insistent daily doodler when she finally had a shot at some "down time," alone in the office. The treatment? I had her regularly take at least 2 hours to herself every Saturday instead of spending every minute with her children, and get home earlier on week days so she had more time with her children then. The results? Shes back on track with her work and feeling good about it again. She had hired me as a career coach to help her get motivated again, and most of what was "off" for her pertained to work/life balance.
This Wasn't Supposed to Happen
Youve got a track record as a effective thinker, youre well-paid as a decision-maker (or problem-solver, strategist, analyst, diagnostician, leader), youre known by peers as a master of her own fate. And here you are, considering hiring a personal coach to help you! Whats that all about? Why cant you do this on your own? .Because you cant think your way to the solution for this challenge. Whats required is not a linear process. And its likely that what youre focusing on as the problem is not the problem.
Growing a career and a family in the same decade is intense and complex. As a life coach, I can tell you when it comes to work-family balance, mastery is not an option! You may find it more challenging than you expected and in ways you didnt anticipate. Plus, you have the distinct privilege of feeling guilty when youre with your children (because youre neither "getting things done" nor working toward career advancement) AND feeling guilty when youre at work (because youre not with your children).
The pressures on you are enormous, and at some point they may take their toll, either on you personally (feeling unhappy, getting sick, no energy), in your job (not up to your usual high standard, not getting results), or in your relationships with your children (kids are super-needy, acting out, or unhappy) or spouse.
How I Can HelpI can help you figure out where youre "off course," whether in your career, your parenting, or your work-life balance. Once identified, well figure out how to get you into action toward an accurate course correction, a process that tends to be iterative and non-linear. Your action will bring you new information as well as lead you to essential new perspectives. Our regular meetings will support you to maintain consistent, focused action, as well as provide you with a context for debriefing and processing your experiences along the way.
I've Been There
I worked all the years my daughters, now adults, were growing up. I know what its like to be reading Babar out loud and planning a meeting at the same time. There were years when I consistently got my office key and my house key mixed up, and occasionally picked up the phone in my kitchen and dialed 9 to get an outside line. I understand the pressures of working a demanding, high-level job while raising a healthy family that makes its own appropriate demands.
Free 30-Minute Consultation
If you are feeling out of balance and think that MAYBE coaching could make a difference for you, consider setting up an initial consultation and seeing what it’s like. No fee, no pressure. Email me with a few times you could be available, and please include your time zone. I’ll get back to you.
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